Oprah is my Fairy Godmother

Most days I fantasize about the Publisher's Clearing House coming to my front door. But every now and then I fantasize about Oprah showing up on my doorstep. In my fantasy she comes with a small camera crew and a plan to recreate my life. There is a trainer who is going to make sure that I work out, there's an organizational expert who will organize my whole house (with my help so I actually learn how to do it and maintain it). Suze Orman comes and fixes my money wounds and talks to my creditors. There's a life coach who looks at all of my skills and helps me to create a plan that immediately fixes my money woes but adresses my long term career goals as well. There is a hair stylist who gives me the makeover of a lifetime and of course someone puts me in an outfit that takes 20 years and 50 lbs. off of me. Sigh.

Then the fantasy gets crazy - Oprah has found someone to sponsor our family. They are going to give us a house with a back yard - some days the house if ours rent free for two years, other days they just give it to us for keeps! And they help us to adopt a teenage girl from Africa, a five year old deaf boy from LA County and a little girl from China - or some other country that needs little girls looked after. When the fantasy is in full tilt they pay off all of our debts, including my student loans, fund our autism charity and get me a job where all I do is think up ideas for television shows.

If I have ten minutes a day to have this fantasy it is tranformational. It is so empowering. I love this fantasy - but sometimes it makes me feel guilty, I am so blessed, surely there are other needier people who are more deserving of a great fairy godmother like Oprah. So some days I talk myself out of the fantasy.

Now the ruby shoe reality is that I am capable, on some level, of creating all of these things without Oprah ever coming to my door. True, Oprah can make it happen in seconds and it may take me a life time, but it is a fantasy worth pursuing.

Soooooo, my first act on my journey to my ruby shoes is to embrace my fantasy. In fact, I am going to act as if it is already true. All of the things in my fantasy, I already have them! And Oprah Winfrey is my Fairy Godmother! This is my new reality. And the world can call me crazy, but I have a grin on my face I can't wipe off and right now everything feels possible.

In the Beginning...

My whole life it seems like I have been waiting. For something to happen, someone to save me, something to change so that everything will suddenly make sense, life will be easy and carefree, I will be doing what I love and feel passionately about and money will be abundant.

At different times in my life different things have worked out. When I was younger I was able to pursue my many creative passions, but while I was doing that money was scarce, friends were abundant but there was no love interest and I had no children, and I desperately wanted children. Then for a while money was not as much of an issue, still no love, no children and friends were scarcer (my job forced me to be far from friends and family). Now I am married and have a fabulous son and good friends abound, but there is less than no money and no time for creative endeavors (at least it feels that way).

I long to have it all at the same time. I believe it is possible. I know that it is possible. I have always believed in the Ruby Slippers. You know when the Good Witch says to Dorothy, "You've had them the whole time." I think that what I have been waiting for my entire life is to realize that I already have everything I need, I just need to look down. I've had this revelation before but now in an effort to hold myself accountable I am going to write down my journey to my Ruby Slippers and when I am done with my journey I will fully possess all of the riches that are already in my life but that I somehow can't quite grasp.

My hope is to find my own Ruby Slippers and if one person reads this and finds their Ruby Slippers as well then I will have done something worthwhile